o/t...kids' dental phobias

M

Michele S

Cathlete
Hi all!

My 5-year-old son in April/May 2003 had some major dental work done, resulting in two capped teeth and two other teeth being filled. It wasn't fun, but somehow he (and I) got through it.

Today I had made an appt. for him to have his teeth cleaned at another dentist's office, thinking that maybe a fresh start would make things easier. We got there, he was fine. The minute he got into the exam room, he totally freaked. I mean, FREAKED!!! He was crying hysterically and would not, no way no how, open his mouth. We wound up leaving there, teeth uncleaned, and as he was getting out of the chair, he gave me this little smirky grin as if to say, "I won." Well, we got in the car and I really freaked on him. I think the grin really got me and my blood was boiling. I've cooled down now, but at the time I thought I could have laid on his body and held his mouth open with my bare hands!

So here's my dilemma...is this a punishable offense and if so, what punishment fits the crime? Today he is banned from playing XBox and he is not to eat any candy until the teeth are cleaned. I'm making another appointment on Monday with the old dentist's office and hoping that between now and then I can get him to understand that a cleaning doesn't hurt.

Any thoughts are appreciated!
Michele
 
I can totally relate. My son was born without enamel on his baby teeth so at 4 had 2 root canals.

We had a WONDERFUL dentist (and hygenist). I think that's key. It is SCARY... How many adults don't like the dentist and just DONT go... (ESPECIALLY Men)... The key for you (I know it isnt easy) is to talk it over with him.. They have great books and videos on the dentist... Gosh the one we used was the little critter one. ANyhow I guess my recommendation is you talk to him about and agree it is SCARY noone likes drilling... but you need the dentists support. I know they put us in extra early before someone was there.

I know its tough... but the key (now that my guy is a teenager) is getting it so he will go to the dentist. You don't want situation where your son stops going when he gets older.

Anyhow I hope I don't sound preechy. Write back if youwant to talkl more..

GOOD LUCK
 
Hi Robyn!

Thanks for your input. My son has also had two root canals and although the entire procedure the first time around took four visits, he never refused to open his mouth. The dentist was no-nonsense, but I think my son sorta knew the drill and never balked! I think, in my mind, I thought changing offices would make things easier, but maybe since he was already used to the other office, this just threw another great big unknown into the mix!

Thanks again! And no, you did't sound preachy!!!:) I always tell myself if this is the worst thing that we have to go through with him healty wise, we're SO LUCKY!

Thanks again!
Michele
 
My son at the age of three had major work done in his mouth, tons of caps and pulpotomies. They did it through same day surgery as not to stress him out and make him affraid of going to the dentist, and just earlier this year he had to have two more pulpotomies and caps and they did that just in his office and he did great!! I think it also depends on the dentist you go to, I took mine to one that specializes in Pediatric dentistry. I have to take him back in just a few weeks.
Also a reminder I never put my child to bed with a bottle but let him walk around with a sippy cup and that also caused bottle rot!! I did not know and felt so bad for that, and to this day still feel guilty about it.
 
Thanks, Leslie.

I'm always glad to hear that other kids have had this same problem. When all this was taking place in April, I felt so guilty! My son's teeth are very tight together and so, basically, I should've been flossing them from day one to prevent all the decay that took place. It's really been fun!x(

My first dentist was a pediatric specialist; the one today was a family practitioner and I now know there is a difference!

Michele
 
Oh Michele, how awful. That lil' grin would have gotten to me too. What a great idea about the "NO candy"! You might want to add pop in there too! ;-) Good Luck next Monday. Hope he does alright!
Your-Friend-In-Fitness, DebbieH http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/wavey.gif[/img] If You Get The Choice To Sit It Out Or Dance...I Hope You DANCE!!!
 
If it gets bad, the dentist can prescribe a tiny Valium dose an hour before the appointment. Then he won't care about his mouth. My daughter was very afraid of needles so when she needed her first filling, they used valium, and then gas before the needle. She didn't even flinch.
 
My 12y/o dtr has always had a phobia at the dentist...she is so afraid of the drill...she has also has had lots of dental work done. Before, they had to give her Valium and Demerol in order for the Pediodonist to do anything and still she wouldn't relax. It's awful, as I know she truly has a fear that is hard for her to control. For the past 2 yrs she has allow them to do her cleanings at our regular dentist but if she needs a filling, we have to take her to the pediodonist as she won't allow herself there. I have tried numerous things to try to convince her or bribe her but nothing has worked. We have paid lots more than what it would have cost, due to her having to go to a specialist and due to some things not covered by insurance. The wierd thing is that she now has braces and is fine with that. She just says that she doesn't like the drill and becasue she can't see what they are doing...it makes her very nervous.
Good luck...I can totally relate to you.
hugs~
Bec
 
Actually sounds to me like your kid shouldn’t’ be eating candies at all. Caped teeth at 5 is pretty young me thinks. My friend is a dentist and he said that pop, candy etc…are the only real cause of tooth trouble (fillings, holes, extractions, etc…). I do know what you mean about kids though. They can be little buggers at times right!?! lol … still you gotta love em for trying.
 
Michele~How did it go today??? Hope all is well!
Your-Friend-In-Fitness, DebbieH http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/wavey.gif[/img] If You Get The Choice To Sit It Out Or Dance...I Hope You DANCE!!!
 
It is my opinion that oftentimes the children get their phobias of dentists from their parents. (or any phobias, for that matter) My mother is absolutely terrified of dentists. I, however, am not. I don't know why. Never have been. Not even for all my ortho and two root canals. My kids also are NOT afraid because 1)I made it clear to them when they were little that there is nothing to fear; 2)If they threw fits about getting their teeth cleaned, they'd have more to fear from ME.

Practically every visit I hear, "Wow, your kids are sooooo good. I wish ALL kids were this good. We get your kids done in 1/2 the time it takes others. They're so easy to work with."

They'd better be.
;-) :D
 
Ooops...I should also say that if it were my child and he pulled that stunt, I'd march his butt right to the bathroom and spank him good.

I know, that offends and freaks people out -- but I'll betcha it'd work.
 
He did it!!!

Just wanted to update this...we went to the dentist today for the cleaning and my son did great! He is a total Nascar nut and with the Daytona 500 just days away, that was a major bribing tool. He knew that if the cleaning didn't get done today, there would be no watching the race.

He told me he was scared when he got into the chair, but the hygienist was great and really worked well with him. The sad part is, he's got a few small cavities but nothing compared to what we went through the last time!

Thanks again for all the advice!
Michele
 
RE: He did it!!!

That's great news! We had the same with a hygenist who actually taught my daughter to do deep breathing (she was also a yoga instructor). Glad to hear it

The best is you taught the kid to deal with a fear and that's a GREAT lesson as we all get fears along the way... Great job mom ;)

I really strongly dont think the approach of marching them into a bathroom and spanking them is good. It's a reall fear and they need to learn to deal with it.. whether it's a test, asking someone out, job interview, public speaking. Great job!
 
RE: He did it!!!

Hi Robyn!

Thanks for the kind reply!

Although my son knew that I meant business this time around, I also recognized that he was genuinely scared. I consider not watching the Daytona 500 enough punishment; and he was also rewarded by being able to go to Walmart to get some new Nascar cars. My son works with bribery, taking away and giving; I would never dream of spanking him to get my point across!

Thanks again!
Michele
 
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