Hi Dana --
As many other people here have said, "heavy" is a very individual thing. It depends upon your weight, height, body composition, # of years training, whether you are male or female, etc. Telling you what I lift is not very helpful in determining what is heavy for you.
As a very general guideline, a good (ie, heavy) bench press poundage for a woman is being able to lift your bodyweight. So, for example, a 120lb woman benching 120lbs is considered excellent. It is a good goal to set for yourself. For squats, 2X bodyweight is very good. So, the 120lb woman squatting 240 is considered very good. These are the 2 big (compound) movements I use to gauge my absolute strength. I don't use any guidelines for the isolation movements (biceps/triceps/etc). In general, I try to lift as heavy as possible so that I will reach failure around the 8th rep. I typically lift in the 8-12 rep range.
These are the goals I use for myself when it comes to heavy lifting. As you can see, it is difficult to get this type of thing at home in most cases.
Shonie